Friday, June 25, 2010

June Awakenings

As this month comes to a close, I can't help but to reflect on how much God has grown me in such a short amount of time. I won't go into details on a public blog, but it's been really good and exasperatingly hard. Forgiveness, self-worth & standing up for myself, trust, patience & endurance, compassion, spiritual warfare, building authentic relationships...these have been some of the areas that God has been growing me in and making me more aware of. I'm excited to grow, even if it's painful but I wonder what he's preparing me for?

As I've been reading The Sacred Romance and The Journey of Desire, I've been opening my heart more to what God is doing in my life...and just as my desire for doing art again has exploded open, my desire for New Zealand is growing once again. I don't know why I have this deep connection to a place so incredibly far away, or even why in 2004 God challenged me to get over my fear of flying and brought me to that beautiful place for the first time but he has opened up this desire once again and I just wish I knew what to do with it. Dare I go back a fourth time? When? This year? Next year? What?

It's okay though. I don't need to have all of the answers. I just have to be open to what God's doing and let him lead me. Easier said than done, but I'll keep trying and he'll keep giving me those opportunities to grow. Of that, I can be sure. :)

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